courage is needed

These are some of the things I should tell you the next time I see you: first of all, I love you, ok? I don`t know why, 'cause I've never had the courage to speak to you properly, but somehow you produce good things on me. I light up whenever I see you (I also get very dumb when you are around, but that's other thing). I get sleep thinking about you, and that is weird, even to someone like me. This love that I feel for you is killing me. I am not able to aproach to you (not in this life), and you don't even know that I exist. Well, here is a clue. It's me, the girl that walks five extra blocks just to avoid you, or the one that doesn't do the shopping anymore, 'cause your house is next to the grocery's. Or that one that asks "casual" questions to her brother about you. It's easy to see how crazy I am since the day I realized that I'm in love with you. Please don't think that I'm gonna call you at 3.00 in the morning to tell you that, or practice black magic just to have you with me. I'm not that insane. But it would be great if you knew that I dream about you constantly. I wish that somehow you could notice me. I wish there was a way. Sometimes at night, I go back to the moments in which I found out something new about you: your name, the football team you support, and some other superficial things that could only matter to a desperate person like me. So, my advice is don't worry about me. Just ignore me, and let me love you. I'll ruin my life, but the good thing is that you don't have to do anything. You don`t even have to pretend that you care about it. Let me be the one who suffers. If someday by any chance you decide to talk to me, I'll probably scream first (please, ignore that), and after I recover I'll be very pleased to talk to you too. Remember that there is a crazy person that feels a hole in her heart that nothing can full. Hope things change for me. I almost forgot: I know the first thing I wrote is that I`ll let you know how I fell about you, but I might not (coward!).